Attaining clarity is a funny thing.  The purpose of attaining clarity is to reach a place of stillness, silence, eternal security, oneness and to essentially become the embodiment of unconditional love.  On the other hand, those are things that do not exist on the material plane and to experience them, one must go ‘in’ and eventually learn to radiate them out.

Is it possible to be in physical form and have multi-dimensional experiences? It is absolutely possible.  What is not possible is to expect to be able to attain such an ability of conscious transmutation while remaining in an environment of a lower vibration – a vibration over-populated by the herd.  If you want to change for the Light-er, you must first purge the metaphysical weight.

Purging the weight is a process of death and rebirth.  It is a process of first accepting and then letting go of perspectives that box you in. Only when you allow these things to die do you create space for rebirth. It’s just like learning how to walk again.

Through this process of acceptance and release, you receive new tools for new purposes.  You can still try to use the old tools to accomplish new tasks, but you’ll eventually find that they don’t work the same way they used to.  In fact, nothing will feel the same as it used to.  The things that once brought you so much joy lead to disappointment and disillusion now.  Once the mind is stretched, it cannot go back to its original form.  You are changed forever.  You may allow the memories of the past to haunt you.  You may choose to try recreating what was once joyful, but nothing tastes nor does it look or feel the same.  All the senses are put to new tests.  The mind is exercised in different ways and the process of change just seems to get faster and more unforgiving. Whoever said that ignorance is bliss had a point.  There’s a temporary bliss connected to ‘not knowing’.

The only time you experience pain from the transformation into Light-ness is when you’ve shifted into a relatively higher vibration while simultaneously continuing to live an existence in tune with a lower vibration.  At this point, it becomes more and more of an effort to ‘balance’ because you’re no longer balancing according to the universal equilibrium. Instead, you’re creating your own scales and conjuring up your own private units of measurement in order to satisfy your egoic desires.  You’re constantly faced with the process of renewal and if you don’t embrace a new perspective of the experiences that come your way, you’ll create pain for yourself. You’ll create a reality of suffering because you will try to exert effort where effort cannot exist.

‘Effort’ is an interesting concept. It’s a deceiving word.  People use the word ‘effort’ with pride.  They believe that it denotes dedication and commitment.  In actuality, effort indicates resistance – it takes place when you’re working against the flow.  If you are working against the flow, you are not working in accordance with the Universal Laws.  You are in opposition to nature.  What is nature’s way of telling us that we are not working in harmony with its laws?  It brings pain.  The source of pain is resistance.

The next time you find yourself exerting effort to accomplish something, observe your mental chatter, ask yourself what you are doing at that very moment, and decide. Do you choose opposition or harmony?

All the world’s a stage,
And all the men and women merely players.
They have their exits and their entrances
And one man in his time plays many parts,
His acts being seven ages.

William Shakespeare – All the world’s a stage (from As You Like It 2/7)

I seem to remember going through this already. Why the repetition? I didn’t enjoy it the first time around, so could I just skip through it this time?

I’m born again, and I’m in a new body. The body has to learn how to function so I have to teach it how to walk and talk and eat without the help of others. That part is fine for me to accept, although that isn’t to say that I enjoy the process of maturation that will eventually allow me to pull away from these twits I have to share classrooms with and eat apple slices coated with the most ridiculous paste they call ‘peanut butter’.

They treat us all the same. Why? We are at such different stages of development. Some of us even still remember. Why are they doing their best to convince us that forgetting is the way forward?

I’m having difficulty merging into these experiences. I want this stage to be over. I want to be able to start where I left off last time. I’ve passed these lessons already. Why again? I have so much work to do, so many tasks to complete, but I can’t do them until I’m at a level near to the one I reached before I left last time. Why the repetition?

Ah…patience. I see! I suppose I could have forgotten more before coming into this life, so that means that I’m remembering more than others for a reason. Is it to teach me patience? Alright, fine, but is that really necessary at this stage? I have so much work to do and I can’t do it from this infant-state. I remember more than most of the teachers who are trying to ‘guide’ me. Why are they not listening when I attempt to explain to them the error of their ways? They call it ‘imagination’…“Look how imaginative she is!” Why are they not listening?

Yes, I know, physical reality = illusion. So perhaps it’s been about deciphering what part of my perception is Truth to begin with…

I don’t know exactly at what stage of my awakening I have reached to date – perhaps because I’m only looking into one dimension of my existence. In any case, I sense that I have not yet reached the peak of my clarity – I knew more in other lives, I knew how to tap into higher levels of power before. At least I’m at a point, though, where I have gone through the mundane. Is it wrong of me to see the early stages of the soul’s maturation as mundane? When you go through them so many times, how can they not become mundane…?

“Soul age refers to how a person has grown from experience on the planet, not just to how many lifetimes he or she has lived. … An Old Soul starts each lifetime being born as an infant who experiences Infant Soul consciousness and gradually grows into prior levels of consciousness. … It does not work to stick your nose in the air (or your head in the sand) in an attempt to avoid lessons and gifts from the other soul ages.”

Source: http://www.michaelteachings.com/soul_ages.html

While reading this wonderful piece, I made some notes about specific parts of the reading that resonated strongly with me…you can find them below:

“Seldom doing anything they don’t want to and preferring their own unconventional pursuits, they often seek the path of least resistance as far as work, so that all energy can be poured into spiritual development.”

…the times when I have accelerate most quickly up the ladder at work were times when I had to consciously disconnect myself from my more ‘spiritually minded’ activities. Otherwise, I would quickly loose interest in the working world, and simply be intoxicated by the metaphysical…

“If higher education proves necessary in order to teach, less orthodox schools allowing more opportunities for inner exploration will be favored.”

…hahaha! I consciously seek out the most unorthodox higher education route that I can find! Being unorthodox FUELS me…

“Old Souls may explore many religions and teachings, being most drawn to those emphasizing love and to those they’ve resonated with closely in past lives. But being rule-bound or as orthodox as some disciplines require does not usually last long.”

…this has unfortunately been the case for me. I have had the soulful pleasure of bonding instantaneously with certain groups, but found that their rules were too difficult by which to abide. This eventually led to my silent departure…

“However, some people get uncomfortable once they are here with their aridity and lack of emotional warmth and set out to make up for what their personality seems to lack….A similar situation arises after a person has had materially successful lifetimes.”

…I have been torn in these worlds of relationships and wealth lately. One part of me craves emotionally rich relationships while another part needs solitude to explore and develop a connection to the wisdom within. One part of me wants to dive into the consumerist culture while the other finds infinite peace in making the most of what I have…

“A major challenge of the Old Soul period is mastering self-esteem.”

…and I thought self-deprecation was noble!

“It is never your last life until you like it here; essence would never let you off the hook before then.”

…OH MY! I have some work to do!

“In order to even out your past life choices, as an Old Soul you are often in the body of the sex you least prefer.”

…so THAT’s why I so understand the physical being-ness of the opposite sex so much more…

“Third level people do best when they give themselves the space and time to stay home and be alone as much as they want. Respecting their own proclivities and loving themselves just the way they are always smooths the way for more enjoyment of self and life.”

…well, I think I just gave myself permission to stop feeling guilty!

Love and Light!